Future Fibro Warrior Lynn Crimaldi wrote this for our Fibro Daily Facebook page and I want to share it with everyone:
Fibromyalgia……Who are you???
I am called Fibromyalgia. I am an invader of your health, a stealer of your peace. I was not invited, but none the less, I am here and I am staying with you forever. I will change you. I will take your comfort and replaced it with pain. But not just any pain… pain like you have never felt before. A kind of pain that rips through your muscles and leaves you weak and fatigued. And not just any fatigue, oh no, I will add what feels like tons of weight onto your muscles which will cause you to feel as though you cannot control your body. I enjoy this. THIS is who I am. I will send coursing and lightning sharp pain into your joints causing you to drop things at random. I enjoy that. You will question your ability to do even the simplest tasks. THIS is who I am. I will wake you in the middle of the night, with pain so intense that it will cause you to cry out, “Why me???”. You will toss and turn to try and rest, but I will not allow you to. THIS is who I am. I will never allow you to fully rest, because that will bring you comfort, and I enjoy stealing that from you. I will cause wide spread pain, in places of your body that never knew pain. I will make you beg for relief. THIS is who I am.
I will sneak my way into your thoughts. I will have you in so much pain that you will question the very person you were, yes, were. THIS is who I am. I will make you think of all the things that you use to do, yet I will cause such havoc, that you can never return to those things. All that you loved, will now have to be scheduled and planned, or better yet, canceled, because I will steal all your strength. THIS is who I am. I will cause you confusion, making simple thoughts seem so difficult. I will make you feel dumb. THIS is who I am. You will eventually become sad, this is a joyous time for me. I have succeeded in making your mind think you are worthless. You will question everything. You will become so overwhelmed from fatigue and pain that you will loose your rational thinking. THIS is who I am. You will try and get rid of me. You will go to a doctor. But he will not understand me, and send you away with more questions then answers. You will continue to search for some end and try to make me go away,but I will not leave. You will go to numerous more doctors. Some will prescribe medicines that will make you feel worse, causing many side effects, this I enjoy. Your body will react and hurt more. THIS is who I am. You will have to endure many uncomfortable exams, and many different blood tests which will show nothing. Even a few medical professionals will tell you that you are indeed crazy. THIS is who I am. You see, I am Fibromyalgia, I will rob you of everything you once held dear. Everything you took for granted, like walking, standing, spending time with friends, and so much more. You will long to have these things back, but I will not return them to you. THIS is who I am.
Indeed, I will stay forever. But I hope you never find out that You are much stronger then I am. With knowledge you can survive. That you can alter your life and make changes within in order to overcome me. No, I hope you never see how by resting a little, this will give you strength to do a little more. Or by eating properly and taking vitamins will increase your immune system, causing your body to fight me. Oh, and please don’t realize that I can never dull your spirit. I can never steal your sparkle. Because even though I reside within, You do shine. I hope you never know, that when you pray to your God, that He hears you and is working on strengthening your soul, to become even stronger to stand taller, to not let me defeat you. That one day, with enough peace inside of you, I will go away for a while, and you can be happy. I do not want you to realize that people love you and understand that I am at fault and not you. I AM Fibromyalgia, I never want you to know that you can manage the pain I cause. That even though your life has changed, you will learn to appreciate the smaller things. That you will see beauty where others do not. And because of my wrath, you will be kinder, and more loving. Because of me, you will cherish your good moments like they are your very last, and you will live, truly live in the moment. That instead of running, you can walk, instead of racing through life, you can slowly stroll through it. That because of me, you will weed out the people who aren’t true and be left with the most beautiful friends to help guide you. No, I do not want you to know anything, I AM Fibromyalgia, I want to keep you weak and sad. I hope you never find out, that you are much stronger then me, indeed. And you can overcome me. That even though I will never leave you, You can shine so bright that it will dull my ache.
That is WHO YOU ARE!!!!
(Written by Lynn Crimaldi January 19, 2014.)
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